Still working on the workbook wishcraft. The most recent exercise asks us to imagine, without editing or considering any limitations, what our ideal day would look like. When I did mine I found that my ideal day was not too far off from what my life is like now. There were some differences like no money worries, we get to do what we want to do rather than have to work for money, but aside from that it was pretty similar. Maybe I just have no imagination or maybe I am close to living the way I want to live. I'm not sure. Anyway, the next thing we are asked to do is pick out the aspects of our day that are 1.essential, the ones that are 2.optional and the ones that are 3.frills, then looking at our essential list, figure out what's in the way of having them. What is the first step to take to make the essentials your life.
Whew. This sounds fun but its hard. I think I'm putting too much pressure on myself, this is just an exercise right?
Here's my essential list:
writing for work
travel/mobility
setting my own schedule/work from home
meaningful work
connection to a world wide community
PJ happy in his work too
enough money not to worry about bills
There. Now what's in the way. I already have some of these things but not exactly the way I want them. So...I don't write for a job yet. There's that. And I don't have enough money to not worry about it. I can set my own schedule pretty much but I don't work from home. My work is already very meaningful. I do not have a solid international community yet either. PJ is not happy with work at the moment.
So I need to find out how to write for a living.
Work from home.
Develop a community.
Make enough money, then PJ can find something he likes more.
Now.... the steps to take to make this happen, that's the next part and I have to think about it. This is the really hard part, the ACTION phase. It's easy to talk but more difficult to take action.
Funny how this all does tie in with my moving to an island. This is what islanders do...they make it work. They chose lifestyle first and then find a way. I'm becoming a real islander. Huh.
Anyway, on with my task.
Hope
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Sunday, January 6, 2013
New Year
It was probably the 3rd of January when I finally realized it's a new year! My usual time of reflecting and renewal is September for some reason so this sort of escaped me for a few days. As the realization dawned on me I began to get the hopeful feelings that thoughts of the future bring. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who sees the world as an open book to be savoured and enjoyed, I only regret the things I'm not doing. And that's a lot these days. One of my major concerns is being so focused on this project of ours, how much am I missing out on the other things in life? I don't feel a balance yet but this is the way it is when you have a big goal like this. The truth is, what we're doing is the foundation for such amazing exploration of all kinds of things...travel, developing friendships, community connections, so much. We are so focused on our task that it seems we are lacking in these areas right now. One of the reasons it gets to me now and then is that I know too well because of my life experiences, that you cannot count on time, things can change and suddenly your life is totally different than you thought it would be. That has happened to me more than once, it has left me afraid to put things off, afraid that I'm missing something or that I'll regret something. That's something I deal with constantly, I'm learning to let it go and stay in the moment, enjoy whatever is in front of me and try to stay balanced so I don't neglect people, pets or things around me just to accomplish something. I'm a virgo so this is not natural for me, I get going on something and get so focused I lose myself.
Anyway, this year I have some goals, not different from last year really but renewed my goals and did a review of last year to see if there is anything I would want to change or revamp. One thing that became glaringly obvious which I should know better is to stay on track with my own life and stop trying to please everyone else. This is a fault of mine and has been my whole life, it hasn't gotten me anywhere. I'm not exactly a pathological people pleaser like some people are but I can have tendency to make sure everyone else is ok while neglecting what would make me ok. I tried to turn that around especially after my divorce. I had to work hard at making sure my needs, rights, self-respect was protected because I KNEW no one else would and I was right. It was the first time I put myself in the front seat and I think it shocked a few people. I still smile when I think of it. The Front Seat!! Because of this realization about myself I now have people in my life who really care, who want me to be happy and think of my needs as well as their own. I've chosen a healing profession but I constantly balance that with honouring my own hopes and dreams and care for my own soul. I would have burned out in my work a long time ago if I hadn't and I can give so much more to clients because I have. They deserve and need someone who is whole and balanced.
So, stay on track, take time for balance and self and relationships and work like hell to finish this island house so we can get on with blissful ordinary life.
Hope
Anyway, this year I have some goals, not different from last year really but renewed my goals and did a review of last year to see if there is anything I would want to change or revamp. One thing that became glaringly obvious which I should know better is to stay on track with my own life and stop trying to please everyone else. This is a fault of mine and has been my whole life, it hasn't gotten me anywhere. I'm not exactly a pathological people pleaser like some people are but I can have tendency to make sure everyone else is ok while neglecting what would make me ok. I tried to turn that around especially after my divorce. I had to work hard at making sure my needs, rights, self-respect was protected because I KNEW no one else would and I was right. It was the first time I put myself in the front seat and I think it shocked a few people. I still smile when I think of it. The Front Seat!! Because of this realization about myself I now have people in my life who really care, who want me to be happy and think of my needs as well as their own. I've chosen a healing profession but I constantly balance that with honouring my own hopes and dreams and care for my own soul. I would have burned out in my work a long time ago if I hadn't and I can give so much more to clients because I have. They deserve and need someone who is whole and balanced.
So, stay on track, take time for balance and self and relationships and work like hell to finish this island house so we can get on with blissful ordinary life.
Hope
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Goals
Soooooooo, last night I started reading Barbara Sher's book Wishcraft which has become a standard in the field of career counselling. Even the guy who wrote What Colour is Your Parachute had good things to say about it. I'm only on the first chapter but I'm going to take my time and make sure I do it thoroughly and with lots of thought. We both need to re-evaluate everything and find a way to change our lives for the better. We already have made great strides by moving to the island in the first place, we have already succeeded in having the lifestyle we want, now to streamline it so that we can sustain it with work we love and make enough to live well. Neither of us is really very materialistic, we cook a lot at home, we enjoy the simple things, the quiet life.
Anyway the first part of the book has two exercises, 1. Who do you think you are? and 2. Remember your original self. She asks the reader to write down who you are, then crumple up the paper and throw it out, then write down your memories of what you loved to see, hear, do as a child growing up, no editing, just remembering. This exercise helps to dissolve the limiting box of thoughts about how we should be and opens us up to possibility. How many of us have completely forgotten about our hope and dreams of our youth? How many of us completely negate the hobbies, interests, talents that we have but don't think of them as important in the grand scheme of things. We tend to limit ourselves to what actions have moved us forward in a career.
I've always loved those stories of people who have a talent that they end up pursuing later in life and finding that it brings them a prosperity they never dreamed of. The book Under the Tuscan Sun is one of them, not the movie, the book. The book was written by a university literature professor ( Frances Mayes) who, in mid-life, was unexpectedly divorced. She went to Italy and bought a run-down villa, wrote about it and created a best selling book, a movie was made about it and it brought her a life that was never imagined in her wildest dreams. Another story I saw on the wonderful tv show called Recreating Eden about a man called Barrie Strohman who retired from his job as a contractor and began cultivating lilies on his property. He became one of the most well-know lily experts in the world!
There are so many stories like this, they are so inspirational. I do not expect to become famous or rich but only to enjoy life and have a right livelihood which is: as Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh wrote,"To practice Right Livelihood (samyag ajiva), you have to find a way to earn your living without transgressing your ideals of love and compassion. The way you support yourself can be an expression of your deepest self, or it can be a source of suffering for you and others. "
So I will journal my progress as well as other day to day events.
Today we planned to go to Victoria shopping but it was too windy so we decided not to take the chance of ferry cancellations and postponed until tomorrow maybe.
Hope
Anyway the first part of the book has two exercises, 1. Who do you think you are? and 2. Remember your original self. She asks the reader to write down who you are, then crumple up the paper and throw it out, then write down your memories of what you loved to see, hear, do as a child growing up, no editing, just remembering. This exercise helps to dissolve the limiting box of thoughts about how we should be and opens us up to possibility. How many of us have completely forgotten about our hope and dreams of our youth? How many of us completely negate the hobbies, interests, talents that we have but don't think of them as important in the grand scheme of things. We tend to limit ourselves to what actions have moved us forward in a career.
I've always loved those stories of people who have a talent that they end up pursuing later in life and finding that it brings them a prosperity they never dreamed of. The book Under the Tuscan Sun is one of them, not the movie, the book. The book was written by a university literature professor ( Frances Mayes) who, in mid-life, was unexpectedly divorced. She went to Italy and bought a run-down villa, wrote about it and created a best selling book, a movie was made about it and it brought her a life that was never imagined in her wildest dreams. Another story I saw on the wonderful tv show called Recreating Eden about a man called Barrie Strohman who retired from his job as a contractor and began cultivating lilies on his property. He became one of the most well-know lily experts in the world!
There are so many stories like this, they are so inspirational. I do not expect to become famous or rich but only to enjoy life and have a right livelihood which is: as Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh wrote,"To practice Right Livelihood (samyag ajiva), you have to find a way to earn your living without transgressing your ideals of love and compassion. The way you support yourself can be an expression of your deepest self, or it can be a source of suffering for you and others. "
So I will journal my progress as well as other day to day events.
Today we planned to go to Victoria shopping but it was too windy so we decided not to take the chance of ferry cancellations and postponed until tomorrow maybe.
Hope
Friday, December 14, 2012
Gratitude
A short post about how today's news has completely changed my concerns about my own small problems....how many families are going to spend Christmas and the rest of their lives without their loved ones. As a person who has experienced personal tragedy myself, I grieve for them and hold my loved ones closer.
We must treasure every day.
Hope
We must treasure every day.
Hope
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Changes
Well, this is a bump in the road. PJ just found out he is probably going to be out of work for about 2 months or so after Christmas. Wow. Just taking in the news and wondering what to do about it. I am a believer in staying positive and hopeful during times like this, although I know its hard, and if you manage to stay in a good state of mind you are far more likely to make it through unscathed and maybe even end up in a better place.
A career counsellor told me recently that at a time like this you have to stop restricting your thinking to what you think needs to happen, you should open up your mind, brainstorm and not limit yourself to anything.
I think that's what we should spend the weekend doing. Making mental maps, otherwise known as mind mapping to figure out where we should go from here. It's scary and exciting at the same time. This could be the beginning of something really interesting for us.
There's a book called What Colour is Your Parachute? that I read years ago and need to read again, for both of us. I love my job now but with our new style and place of living, things really do need to change. I knew it before but now I have to face it head on.
I'll probably share a lot of the learning right here on this blog as a way to process and who knows, help somebody else.
So to begin:
I will be open to whatever happens
I will be grateful for what I already have and what I have accomplished
I will remain hopeful and confident
I will stay connected with people and situations that encourage hope and confidence. Positive people.
I will gain clarity and focus, then act
I will do something every day to pursue my goals
I will visualize success in all areas of my life
I will choose to make this process one of ease, grace and simplicity
I will explore every option
There, that's the beginning, I feel better already. I find another thing that helps me is reading about people who have overcome huge obstacles and about people who have accomplished wonderful things that they can be so proud of after their work is done on this earth. I will read more of these stories too.
Hope
A career counsellor told me recently that at a time like this you have to stop restricting your thinking to what you think needs to happen, you should open up your mind, brainstorm and not limit yourself to anything.
I think that's what we should spend the weekend doing. Making mental maps, otherwise known as mind mapping to figure out where we should go from here. It's scary and exciting at the same time. This could be the beginning of something really interesting for us.
There's a book called What Colour is Your Parachute? that I read years ago and need to read again, for both of us. I love my job now but with our new style and place of living, things really do need to change. I knew it before but now I have to face it head on.
I'll probably share a lot of the learning right here on this blog as a way to process and who knows, help somebody else.
So to begin:
I will be open to whatever happens
I will be grateful for what I already have and what I have accomplished
I will remain hopeful and confident
I will stay connected with people and situations that encourage hope and confidence. Positive people.
I will gain clarity and focus, then act
I will do something every day to pursue my goals
I will visualize success in all areas of my life
I will choose to make this process one of ease, grace and simplicity
I will explore every option
There, that's the beginning, I feel better already. I find another thing that helps me is reading about people who have overcome huge obstacles and about people who have accomplished wonderful things that they can be so proud of after their work is done on this earth. I will read more of these stories too.
Hope
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Christmas
Back in the city once again, ferry ride a little bumpy this time, some whitecaps out there. The Santa ship was fanatastic, much more than I expected.
Santa and Mrs Claus and the entourage of singers and Christmas Pirates got off the ship and entertained everyone especially the children who got to sit on Santa's knee and got a present to take home. Everyone was in such great spirits. I am more impressed with this island all the time. Considering the small population of full time residents, they have amazing community events such as this one. I will be attending and posting pictures of the annual new year's eve lantern festival which is even more amazing.
Our plan this weekend is to sail over to the Victoria to do some Christmas shopping and just enjoy the beautiful decorations that Victoria always manages to do. What a gorgeous city. I am so looking forward to it. This years Christmas gift for me is a yearly membership to the Butchart Gardens. They are so beautiful and how wonderful to be able to go any time though the year. Victoria is actually closer than Vancouver for us so we will be able to visit the gardens often.
Went for lunch at a new Thai place, it was really great, curried tofu and vegetables. I have to get my ritual city food. At home in our new kitchen we tend to cook everything ourselves, we love it and our new kitchen is just amazing. We have one of those stoves that is sort of industrial style, lots of heat and looks great, stainless of course. Bought it at costco for a fraction of what it would be anywhere else. This Thursday its our annual shortbread making day, I made mustard pickles last weekend. I have been craving them and no one makes them the way I like them. Really good. We have been using a special shortbread mold pan the last few years, really like it, it's pattern is the thistle. How Scottish.
When I get home this time it will be time to clear out more of the construction mess and make room for our time off. It's so much harder to do this when its cold and rainy outside but I must. It's getting me down and looks so terrible. Even an organized mess is better. PJ wants to start the seat/storage area in the entry. Where to put his tools?! ARGGG!!
It will be so good when we're done. Imagine......
Hope
Santa and Mrs Claus and the entourage of singers and Christmas Pirates got off the ship and entertained everyone especially the children who got to sit on Santa's knee and got a present to take home. Everyone was in such great spirits. I am more impressed with this island all the time. Considering the small population of full time residents, they have amazing community events such as this one. I will be attending and posting pictures of the annual new year's eve lantern festival which is even more amazing.
Our plan this weekend is to sail over to the Victoria to do some Christmas shopping and just enjoy the beautiful decorations that Victoria always manages to do. What a gorgeous city. I am so looking forward to it. This years Christmas gift for me is a yearly membership to the Butchart Gardens. They are so beautiful and how wonderful to be able to go any time though the year. Victoria is actually closer than Vancouver for us so we will be able to visit the gardens often.
Went for lunch at a new Thai place, it was really great, curried tofu and vegetables. I have to get my ritual city food. At home in our new kitchen we tend to cook everything ourselves, we love it and our new kitchen is just amazing. We have one of those stoves that is sort of industrial style, lots of heat and looks great, stainless of course. Bought it at costco for a fraction of what it would be anywhere else. This Thursday its our annual shortbread making day, I made mustard pickles last weekend. I have been craving them and no one makes them the way I like them. Really good. We have been using a special shortbread mold pan the last few years, really like it, it's pattern is the thistle. How Scottish.
When I get home this time it will be time to clear out more of the construction mess and make room for our time off. It's so much harder to do this when its cold and rainy outside but I must. It's getting me down and looks so terrible. Even an organized mess is better. PJ wants to start the seat/storage area in the entry. Where to put his tools?! ARGGG!!
It will be so good when we're done. Imagine......
Hope
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Back Home
Back home on the island once again, ferry ride last night was nice and peaceful as usual and a good way to transition into 'island time', islanders like to say that they keep the ferry run long enough to allow the city dwellers to shake off the stress so they won't bring it on the island. Works for me and now I do find traffic and the buzz of the city a bit overwhelming at times. After two days I'm ready to come back beleive it or not.
The sushi was amazing! They are quite a creative bunch in the kitchen although they have great standard stuff as well. It was a new place that has just been discovered, inexpensive and fantastic. That's one thing we do miss is the ethnic restaurants. The restaurants on the island are good too but nothing compares to city ethnic holes in the wall that we love so much and lived so close to. In our neighbourhood alone there was: Philippine, Chinese, Indian, Indian-Chinese, Japanese, Mexican, Greek and more all within just a walk or a short drive and none very expensive. We loved loved loved that about our neighbourhood.
Just packed up the christmas box going to family on the east coast. Going to cost way too much of course, but I just have to include my own personal shortbread and so many other small details that it ends up being a big production. All worth it when they open it and are delighted with the small special items.
Also went to my first official appointment with my health care practitioner here, transferred my chart but its not there yet. They ordered blood tests and called a few hours later to schedule a follow up appointment. I immediately thought - oh oh. But I waited until the appointment to find out what was going on, turns out, nothing! They are just that fast! Wow, I'm liking this rural thing already. At home it would be hours out of my day, a 6-10 buck parking fee and having to call back myself to find out the results. This is so great. I feel like I actually matter and have people who take care of my health. I love it.
We're currently deliberating over our Christmas plans. This year is different, we would love to just stay here and keep it low key but there are family members to consider. As much as we love getting together, it seems there's so much stress to make that one day special that it gets in the way of reason sometimes. We have to get creative. I'm calling it Christmas week from now on, give us more leeway. But I am will totally enjoy having two weeks off this season.
Going to the Santa Ship this weekend, never been before. Its been a long tradition on the Gulf Islands and the San Juan islands. Check it out:
Pacific Northwest Santa Ship
I can't wait!
Hope
The sushi was amazing! They are quite a creative bunch in the kitchen although they have great standard stuff as well. It was a new place that has just been discovered, inexpensive and fantastic. That's one thing we do miss is the ethnic restaurants. The restaurants on the island are good too but nothing compares to city ethnic holes in the wall that we love so much and lived so close to. In our neighbourhood alone there was: Philippine, Chinese, Indian, Indian-Chinese, Japanese, Mexican, Greek and more all within just a walk or a short drive and none very expensive. We loved loved loved that about our neighbourhood.
Just packed up the christmas box going to family on the east coast. Going to cost way too much of course, but I just have to include my own personal shortbread and so many other small details that it ends up being a big production. All worth it when they open it and are delighted with the small special items.
Also went to my first official appointment with my health care practitioner here, transferred my chart but its not there yet. They ordered blood tests and called a few hours later to schedule a follow up appointment. I immediately thought - oh oh. But I waited until the appointment to find out what was going on, turns out, nothing! They are just that fast! Wow, I'm liking this rural thing already. At home it would be hours out of my day, a 6-10 buck parking fee and having to call back myself to find out the results. This is so great. I feel like I actually matter and have people who take care of my health. I love it.
We're currently deliberating over our Christmas plans. This year is different, we would love to just stay here and keep it low key but there are family members to consider. As much as we love getting together, it seems there's so much stress to make that one day special that it gets in the way of reason sometimes. We have to get creative. I'm calling it Christmas week from now on, give us more leeway. But I am will totally enjoy having two weeks off this season.
Going to the Santa Ship this weekend, never been before. Its been a long tradition on the Gulf Islands and the San Juan islands. Check it out:
Pacific Northwest Santa Ship
I can't wait!
Hope
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